I've been feeling sorry for myself all day. I'm all alone boohoo. I have no-one to spend valentine's day with boohoo. etc etc
I came on here to blog about it. Before I had a chance to hit the "new post" button something in my reading list caught my eye.
For a while I've been following a blog written by a mum who's 12-year old son is dying of cancer. The last few days have been really bad. Today's post is entitled Inga Andetag Nu roughly translated - No more breaths.
I don't feel sorry for myself anymore. I mostly feel ashamed.
You can read the blog here: Annas Anatomi and if you feel so inclined, donate some money to one of the collections she links to.
I'm watching a show on channel 4 called One born every minute. It's women giving birth... I'm not sure it's a good idea for me to watch this. I kinda had this idea that it would be all nice and sweet and aww, look a baby. But it's all pain and grunting and horribleness. And babies of course. And of course I know that childbirth is not fluffy cotton candy and summer meadows ans pink roses. It's bloody and messy and painful. And things go wrong...
I'm not sure what I'm getting at. Just I don't think this is helping my fear of childbirth...
1. I chipped a nail yesterday, badly. I don't think I've ever had a chip that large come off without the nail breaking... I had to get dressed really quickly as I'd woken up just 5 mins before I'm supposed to be out the door with the minis. At some point during that mad rush a chunk of acrylic, a quarter of my nail, disappeared. So today I went and had it fixed. Actually I went yesterday after work but she was closed and, say what you will about me, I learn form my mistakes. No-one but Vanessa touches these babies! So I went back today and she managed to squeeze me in. And she wouldn't even take any money for it. She really is a darling!
2. I'm doing an experiment. Can't tell you what it's about as that would kinda ruin it. All I can say is that it's day two and so far it's going the way I thought it would.
3. I need to take action. Don't know what kind, but some kind. OK, so this one's sort of a work in progress. I'll get back to you on it...