Saturday, 4 September 2010

Sisyphus pt.2

I've been tidying and rummaging and sorting for a good few hours now.
I've got a bin bag full of stuff for the charity shops and a bunch of stuff I'm undecided about.
At this point I've a good mind to just chuck the lot! I want to declutter a bit but it's proving difficult.
I live in a (fairly good sized it must be said) single bedroom. Or maybe it's a box room I'm, I'm not sure. And when I say live in, I mean live in. Due to various unforeseen circumstances I am now a live-in nanny. I went from having a flat (shared with my sister) to living in a flat share to just living in a room. And all my accumulated stuff has to live here with me. I wasn't supposed to be a live-in so my room is actually the oldest daughter's room and a lot of her stuff is still in here. Hence, I have nowhere to put my stuff.
I am also somewhat of a hoarder so I have a lot of stuff. I'm always buying books and, being me, I want to keep them after I've read them. I now have 2 storage boxes full of books sitting on my floor...
I have tons of clothes, most of which I never wear, and they don't all fit in my wardrobe.
There's CDs, DVDs, magazines, stuff and tat.
Most of this lives in various boxes, bags and/or piles that just get moved around the room.
I feel like a dog chasing it's tail... I keep deciding to have a sort through and get rid of some stuff and organise the rest but half way through I get sick of it, start despairing and give up. I've never been good at finishing things at the best of times.
Today I have been ruthless when going through my stuff. I keep finding things I've completely forgotten I have and thinking "oh, this might be good to have/come in handy..." and then I tell myself: No, you didn't miss it before and you won't miss it later. If I didn't even know I had it, it obviously wasn't that important!
I'm hoping I'll at least get some sort of order this time though, before I lose my mind completely!

I want to have a nice space to live in and I keep thinking that if my room wasn't such a mess I wouldn't feel so apathetic about everything else...

Here's hoping!
sab x

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